• You Decided to Stay with a Cheater

  • You went through the phone last night and found some things you did not like. Your partner is cheating!

    Now, you have a big decision to make. You wonder what is the best decision to make. Do you stay or do you go? This is a message for those who decide to stay. You will be angry and you will need time to heal.

    “Staying does not meant it is a free for all to punish your partner forever, as much as it feels like it should be.”

    You will ask why many times. You will wonder why you were not good enough. Wonder how they can say they love you and still cheat on you. Well if no one has told you yet: It is NOT your fault your partner cheated.

    The Choice

    Cheating is a choice and it is a poor choice your partner made but it was their choice. You had no control over this situation. You can only control you. Sine you made the decision to stay and work things out it means you are making a decision to continue to be someone’s partner.

    You may also want to be vindictive. You will want to hurt your partner how they hurt you. You will want revenge. You deserve to feel how you feel. However, acting on those feelings will not help your relationship.

    Forgiveness

    Staying does not meant it is a free for all to punish your partner forever as much as it feels like it should be. Your responsibility to your relationship will be to figure out how to forgive your partner and begin to build intimate trust again.

    It is possible for a couple to survive a cheating event with time, healing, developing healthy boundaries together, and a whole lot of communication. 

    -Jessi

    Photo by Shamim Nakhaei on Unsplash